There is a saying that when you find your spiritual teacher this is when your life truly begins. For me the proof is in the experience as these days I feel a sense of fulfilment steadily growing within myself, and an enthusiasm to share with other serious seekers the solace that guidance is available to each one of us in the moment we are ready to receive it. I feel for the first time in my life unwaveringly certain on my spiritual path with a maturing inner knowing that in the SACRED Sangha under the profound and personalised spiritual guidance of Raaman, I am in safe hands and my direction is set.
For years before, I hopped and jumped between many different approaches to spirituality, always afraid that I might be delving too deep into the wrong one. I became completely lost and overwhelmed amongst the manifold offerings, the literature, the concepts and ideas. I wasted copious amounts of time and effort questioning, back-stepping, worrying about whether I was going the right way.
I also studied long and hard to attain a Masters in Architecture as well as two Bachelors and a myriad of certificates, and then acquired a position in a large firm and created my own business. And yet after all this I finally realised that exhausting myself to save this planet was not working and that it is impossible to heal my outer world without determining which inner beliefs were making it so.
With the immense support and direction I receive through the Sangha, I am developing the self-confidence and inner faith I have been needing to dive in as deeply and enthusiastically as I dare. My spiritual quest has had its ‘edge’ taken off as all that energy previously squandered is now being rechanneled into advancing wholeheartedly in my chosen path. Through this process of inner work, Raaman with great love and grace, is connecting me with his lineage of spiritual masters and teachers. And it is with these masters, saints and sages that my inner voice, my higher guidance, my inner knowing develops and becomes one and the same. With the long discipleship of these spiritual beings to teachers before them, I discover an immense strength and validation within myself for my highest transformation.
I discuss it often with the other members of our Sangha. How to share with someone who doesn’t have a guru or a spiritual teacher, how it is to be with one? How to explain the incredible grace and ease and flow that is on offer to every person when we seek and find our teacher in this chaotic world to help reunite us with True Self. In the east this is most commonplace but in the west we struggle with this need. After years of trying everything and arriving at a point of no longer knowing what else to do, the strong realisation came to me that I need a master’s help. And mercifully during this time, Raaman came into my life along with his inspiring group of students to show me a new reality and possibility of living. Admittedly it was not an easy step to take to join the Sangha. All my biggest fears came up in the moment when this became a likely possibility. With all the inauthentic guru stories going around which arouse much controversy and doubt, it felt difficult to determine what was true and what was fear and it was only by inquiring deeply and trusting in my own Higher Guidance that I was able to make the leap…and I am so grateful I did. This infinite blessing of receiving guidance to lighten the load – an external flame to alight my own inner flame – feels almost too good to be true but the confirmation is in my realised experience.
Many of you who have met Raaman in satsang, workshop or session well know it is not always easy to be faced so directly with your inherent anxieties, difficulties and frustrations. I know for myself that in the moment Raaman directs awareness into a disserving pattern or past pain he sees within me it can be extremely uncomfortable to accept as it often brings up strong emotions as it releases. This powerful process stirs everything up and then it is up to me to be with it emotionally and mentally, and to process further any thoughts and feelings that overcome me. However because it is always done with love, it is with all certainty that light gradually enters into this energy field and life begins to flow again with a fresh vigour, hindering beliefs drop and things become easier.
At these times when past pains are stirred up, the incredible support of the SACRED Sangha is hugely beneficial and even fundamental in helping to pull me through into the awaiting light and peace. Upheld by these divine souls of the SACRED Sangha, so diligent, sensitively-attuned and dedicated to their inner work and an evergrowing devotion to God, we create an environment for deeply supportive transformational healing.
To me SACRED Release is miracle work that literally changes the course of experienced life as pains and past beliefs are brought into conscious awareness and supported to be released. As a group we offer one another SACRED Release sessions bringing in deep relaxation and connection to our shared Higher Guidance. Learning this divine art of clairvoyance in direct connection with Higher Truth is strengthening my belief in myself and in a higher power. It is giving me divine access to my own processes and a means to help others. For the first time I feel like I am forming authentic and lasting relationships. Having this SACRED tool means that difficulties lose their power and instead become opportunities for profound healing to occur. Light and awareness is brought in to dissipate the underlying past trauma playing out making new space for compassion in the giver and receiver.
In this blessed environment of feeling supported and honoured to be who I truly am, I can feel the softness of my innate femininity, previously caught up in conceptual ungrounded ideas, gently begin to blossom. All my life I have believed I need to be a strong, powerful, independent woman. That I had to fend for myself and protect myself in this dangerous world otherwise I judged myself as being weak and needy. But within such an empathetic and caring Sangha, I see myself questioning this aggressive need for self-reliance. I see how my divine feminine is in reality very vulnerable and has been hurt and overridden before which is why she sometimes disproportionately lashes out as she relives a past trauma. And now as I am being offered the space and the love I need to feel secure, so too does it become more possible for irrelevant beliefs and blocks to come up, be seen, processed and released. As I let go strong-minded pained beliefs that I need to overly protect myself, I am amazed to see the physical evidence in my face and my body as my features relax and soften in surrender to my true nature.
For me there can be no turning back at this point. To know a life without God and then to experience a life with Him are two completely different realities. One is lonely, scary, stressful and untrusting, a proud yet artificial autonomy. While life with God is an utter relief, like coming in from the storm, awakening to the truth that I am deeply taken care of, that I am worthy, appreciated and eternally loved. I open to this truth with the grace of a highly committed teacher and Sangha and with the SACRED Release work which have been vital for me to feel safe and supported to undergo deep transformation, to face very challenging traumas and blocks, and to keep me continually on-track and in a field of evergrowing love and care.
I am truly blessed.
~Poem For My Teacher~
My dear beloved Raaman
I cannot B without U
It's an impossibility of this universal stew. You are the reason my heart sings through the day,
That makes everything that's not love wither and decay.
I am so beyond grateful to have a teacher like you,
A role model and leader to guide my way through.
How I ever lived without you I can never really know,
I guess you have always been with me in some way cheering me as I go.
Your presence, your form, your love, your embrace,
Your beauty, your care, your kindness and your grace.
Are all the things I cherish - that I wish to know more of,
That I may shed all the rest to get to the core of.
The love that's within me,
That meets the love within you,
The one that lights up my insides and makes me see through.
Any illusion, any worries, any pity or self doubt,
That brings me back to 'I' - what it's all about.
I want you, I need you, I learn to let go,
As I begin to realise it's all a big show.
That you are me - one and the same,
Past, present and future - it's all a big game.
It scares me, it haunts me, I don't wanna know.
I love it, I yearn it, it makes my heart grow.
So caught up inside with what's right and wrong,
That I forget to enjoy what's really going on.
To be present, to love, to know it's all fine,
To forget all the baggage I carry along.
But just for a moment to give it all up,
So that 2 souls can meet and make it all stop!
To be held in your gaze and realise it's you.
No it's me! No it's you!
Oh - it's all true!
I rediscover myself simply by knowing you,
By removing all else and giving into you.
And it's terrifying and I love it, it's what I want to do,
'Cause I see the light you shine in all that you do.
The way you help others, you forgive and you serve,
Are all the things I wish for in myself to go more into lurve...
To hold Baba in my heart, my being and my mind,
To release into the unknown where it's me that I find.
Thank you so deeply for teaching me how to relate,
For holding my hand through confusion and self-hate.
Taking me to a place of deeper intimacy, so natural and so kind,
That removes all the barriers and leaves all falsehood behind.
For being playful and joyous and resurrecting fun!
To remember it's all silly, all nothing, just a big pun.
So daring, so carefree,
Thank you for supporting me.
To laugh more, to relax, to love and let go,
All the things that matter - to give up to God and the flow.
You make me feel so safe like a Big Papa Bear,
The way you hold the Sangha with assurance and care.
Creating a forcefield filled with steadiness and Love,
Giving us the security and trust we need to rise above.
And I feel so humbled that I may be with you as your student, beloved, SACRED worker, devotee,
Trusting more and more the reflection you offer me.
I love the man you are - for how you make me feel like a woman,
That is learning to love and become a real human!
Thank you for your honesty, your sensitivity and your trust,
That God has brought ME to YOU - He must love me - He really must!
For knocking everything off it's pedestal and bringing it back to life,
For being here with me through joy and through strife.
You are the man of my soul because you let God shine through you,
And lift me up to higher planes so I may finally meet Him too.
Raamanji I SO LOVE YOU!